A trip to the bank...

Background information:
During the process of obtaining a mortgage I realized how much we were being charged in fees by our bank! I know...I'm the idiot who didn't open my bank statements what can I say.
As a result of my new found financial savvy, I decided to change banks and get a better deal.  We began the process of transferring incoming and outgoing funds as soon as the house-buying process was complete.  I carefully balanced the incoming monies from the accounts with the out going funds (or so I thought, but that is another story entirely) and was at the point of closing out 2 of 3 accounts at The Bad Bank. 
Today is the day I am going to close those accounts...bloodsuckers!  I am exhausted so I decide I will just write the teller a note:
     Hello Sir or Madam,
     I require a wheelchair and am feeling too tired to get it out of the back and could I close accounts B and C and gave her the necessary information.
The response: YOU MUST COME IN!
Excuse me?
YOU MUST COME IN!
I replied with sarcasm, and made sure to point out I was being sarcastic...just in case she didn't catch it the first time.
Now I'm PISSED so no longer too tired.  I pull over into a spot walking palms against the length of my van to the back, open it up, throw myself into the back of the van, grab my chair, whip it out onto the ground, slam the breaks on and throw myself into the chair.
I slam the van shut and starting rolling toward the door... a man is just existing the bank while another man jogs ahead of me... I'm thinking great those doors are heavy as hell.
I get to the door just as the man exiting is handing the door off to the jogger...I get half way through and jogger drops the door on me!  The door is so heavy I start to tip over!  I try repositioning my weight but I know I'm going down.  I don't know if it was the sound or what but exiting man, runs back to the door and grabs it just in time for me to get myself upright again.  He then opened the next door to help me through.  THANK YOU!!!!!
So I get in the bank and NOW I"M REALLY PISSED!
I roll into the direct center of the bank and begin to assess the staff.  I'm am attempting to profile the manager...I look to my right there is a young women working with a customer who barely has noticed me there.  I turn to the left and one by one observe the body language of each bank staff member.  As I near then end of the line, I notice the tall thin young man.  While all eyes are on me at this point, Lord knows what they were all thinking :)
As I study his face I notice he has acne, a cheap suit and is staring down!  I look around some more as he avoids eye contact with me the tellers start to appear nervous; eyes darting from their respective customers, to me, TO HIM, and this cycle continued...as a sat and observed. Yup that's him.
By now our young manager looked like he might pee his pants...I have 2 young boys so I felt for him a bit and decided to end his misery.
I started to slowly roll over to him.  He slowly looked up and I caught his eyes with mine.  He said something to a pretty young teller and began to walk my way....something like the way my youngest does once I have bagged him hiding homework he didn't finish.
As he approach I said, "Are you the manager?" (in an annoyed voice that sounded just like MY Mom)
In a soft and cracking voice he replied with a yes.
I explained my drive-thru experience and then almost being maimed just getting into the frigging bank and that "I was only going to close 2 of my accounts but now I want to close all 3 and I want my money right now!"
Needless to say, all eyes were on me for sure now!  I was quickly being helped and apologies galore.  I was fuming...I yelled you need a button on that door how do you expect someone like me to get in here when your damn policies mandate that we come in here to complete specific transactions!!!!
OK so if he hadn't peed his pants yet he was about to...the dreaded frustration cry!!!
I bust into tears which were only fueled by my further frustration that I was crying and I was really PISSED that I was because I was not sad...but I am pretty certain I did look quite pathetic at this point.
Tissue were being shoved in my face and promises of buttons..."I'll call as soon as you leave"...and then came the transaction.  I signed the paperwork and she handed me my money...
Remember I told you we were transferring funds and such.  Well she quietly said, "Here you are Mrs. Deery, thirty-six dollars and forty-seven cents."  I could have LAUGHED OUT LOUD!!!!
As much as I appreciated her whispering the amount, I took that money as if it were 50grand and snapped a thank you at her.  The Manager escorted me to the door and offered to put my wheelchair in my car for me...poor kid.  I told him in the sternest Mom voice I could muster, "I will be back to check on the status of that button!"
And I rolled away...